EvilMister Encounters a Stink So Bad, He Almost Finds Religion

I don't know how it happened, I don't want to know. Before this day, October 25th, 2004, I have smelled things that made me reconsider my basic principles on life and liberty. I've smelled garbage left in the sun for two weeks. I've inhaled the odor of rotted meat. I've walked across a beach where all kinds of fish all of a sudden decided they could breathe air and found that they were wrong.

Today was different.

Today I worked side by side with Mr. Stinky.

I doubt I'll ever get the stink out of my mind. It's seared in there like it was branded onto my brain. A giant "MS" burn mark runs ragged across my olfactory nerves and into the memory centers of my brain. Imagine the smell of ass. This is ass that has sweated freely, but ass that has been contained in some kind of leather/rubber ass-trapping underoos. Now imagine B.O. Not normal B.O., but the rank musk of a Sasquatch-like mojombo who's only just that morning shaved his all over body hair and gone into work. I could go on, but I gotta tell ya, I can't stop the shivering. I need to take a bath in tomato juice.